Supporting grieving children

Living with the pain of loss: For some children, their loss or bereavement can be the first time that they have experienced profound abandonment. Fears may arise that they might be similarly abandoned again. Nor do all children understand that the pain they feel will subside.

In addition, they may try to protect the feelings of others by avoiding displays of emotion in front of them and, as a result, their feelings can go underground and resurface at a later period in their life.

Strategy - Reassurance

Don't underestimate the impact a loss has on a child even if they do not respond as expected. Reassure the child that their basic needs will be met and that over time their pain will decrease. Maintain routines and standards of discipline as much as possible, as this creates a sense of safety and predictability for the child.

Children express their grief differently: Children may not have the ability to name or express their feelings because they are not visible or concrete. Because children haven't developed buffers to pain as adults often have, the feelings they experience may be overwhelming for them. Therefore, children often express their grief through their behaviour such as separation anxiety, crying, withdrawal, bedwetting, disinterest in food, or disruptive behaviour at school.

Strategy - Give children the opportunity to express their grief in their own way

The full article is here: http://www.grief.org.au/grief_and_bereavement_support/understanding_grief/supporting_children